there's a black and stormy sea, that toils outside my window. her dark waves broil and bubble i feel her clawing up my legs. she lives inside me. i can sometimes feel her long spindly, spider-like fingers cold and wet, seeping into my pores. in my skin, down my throat. i feel her gentle icy waves slowly fill my heart like a cup full of water. "it's okay," she says "this is normal," she says. i don't think this is normal. i often find myself beneath her night sky waves, struggling to find the breath that escaped from my blue lips. at the bottom of her crest is a pretty canary cage that she locks me in and it's not like i'm going to escape. but i can try. i just want to go home. i just want to go home. i don't want to be here. i just want to go home.

jen, Wisconsin